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Author Topic: OJ's guide to having a ugly/fat girl on the side!!!  (Read 1164 times)

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OJ SimpsonTopic starter

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OJ's guide to having a ugly/fat girl on the side!!!
« on: January 01, 2009, 11:08:27 PM »

Ever have a girl friend who you adore, but need a little something else for those wild occasions? Ever consider a fat or ugly girl?

Don't laugh my friend, listen to the master.

Having a fat or ugly girl on the side is a very beneficial situation all men should pursue. Why? Easy.


Now, go out drinking or fucking around and get in trouble. Now if you get caught with your head between the legs of a nice fresh college student, ( Another guide shortly about those coming up!!! ), you could get arrested for it, I know you can in the state I reside in, but if you do, you going to call your wife to bail you out, and risk get a ugly, messy divorce?

Fuck that, you call the ugly/fat chick to bail you out, and because they are ugly/fat, they will forgive you on top of it. They have it etched into their brains no one will ever love them, this is way too good for any smart male to pass on. You owe it to yourself to use this to your advantage.

What else can the ugly/fat chick do for you?

Shit, need to go out for a night of drinking and or fucking around but you need cash for your child's doctor appointment? Call the ugly/fat chick. Especially in these time of economic uncertainty, having a few ugly/fat chicks around earning you some positive monthly cash flow is always appreciated.

Consider the ugly/fat chick a second, hidden piggy bank.

How do you snag one? Real fucking easy my friends. Now the ugly girl, just call her beautiful, sexy, shit like that, she will eat it up. The coupe de grace is buying her underwear, then tell her you want to see her wearing it. You have a ugly second paycheck for life.

The fat girl is just as easy. NEVER call her skinny, she will see through that, and you would look like a dunce to say that. When she calls herself fat, just say, "Oh, come on, your not fat, why do you put yourself down like that ?, the proceed to pick apart the things she says about herself, but make it positive. Even if your lying to her, look her in the eyes and make her feel good about herself. This takes some time to learn how to do it and keep a straight face, but chalk ever situation to experience and learn from them.

Words of warning?

Fat girls can get possessive, never take them to places you take your real girl friends. Never give a fat girl your real phone number, I recommend one of those disposable pay as you go phones highly. NEVER EVER MEET A FAT/UGLY GIRLS PARENTS!!! Try to keep cash you get from them around 300 dollars a month, more than that and they get curious, less than that and they will feel they are not helping you. It also goes without saying, try to keep sex off as long as humanly possible, as sex will usually put them in relationship mode, and we don't want that.

So what are you waiting for, get yourself a fat/ugly girl today and reap in the rewards!!!

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Persephone

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Re: OJ's guide to having a ugly/fat girl on the side!!!
« Reply #1 on: January 02, 2009, 07:20:59 AM »

It's really too bad you can't find gainful employment and a woman.
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And I'll dance with you in Vienna, I'll be wearing a river's disguise. The hyacinth wild on my shoulder, my mouth on the dew of your thighs. And I'll bury my soul in a scrapbook, with the photographs there, and the moths and I'll yield to the flood of your beauty my cheap violin and my cross.

OJ SimpsonTopic starter

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Re: OJ's guide to having a ugly/fat girl on the side!!!
« Reply #2 on: January 02, 2009, 01:51:11 PM »

I have both and then some.

A fantastic job, a beautiful wife and mistress, and 2 ugly girls just in case.
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Re: OJ's guide to having a ugly/fat girl on the side!!!
« Reply #3 on: January 02, 2009, 05:42:08 PM »

I have both and then some.

A fantastic job, a beautiful wife and mistress, and 2 ugly girls just in case.

This fantastic job you have OJ, i'm taking it that it's one of those jobs that's fantastic for the warm feeling inside it gives you cos the wages are obviously shite buddy.

Quote
Shit, need to go out for a night of drinking and or fucking around but you need cash for your child's doctor appointment?

and then of course there was

Quote
Ever go to a bar and notice you just don't have enough funds available to keep you in alcoholic refreshment all night?

You seem to be short of a few quid mate, wassup not got enough ladies in tow to pay for all your needs? You're slacking mate, surely a man of your calibre wouldn't go short of money when you've got such dazzling good looks and a great persona.

I'm flummoxed.  :shrug:

Me personally i've got enough cash to pay for my own family and don't need to prostitute myself with fat ugly chicks who i'd have to take Viagra to function with.

Yeah, i think i'll stick to being me thanks.

PS don't forget to wear a condom, you don't want more gifts than you ask for.  :wink:

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Re: OJ's guide to having a ugly/fat girl on the side!!!
« Reply #4 on: January 03, 2009, 09:49:16 AM »

Everybody's beautiful on teh internetz.
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And I'll dance with you in Vienna, I'll be wearing a river's disguise. The hyacinth wild on my shoulder, my mouth on the dew of your thighs. And I'll bury my soul in a scrapbook, with the photographs there, and the moths and I'll yield to the flood of your beauty my cheap violin and my cross.

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Re: OJ's guide to having a ugly/fat girl on the side!!!
« Reply #5 on: January 03, 2009, 02:31:52 PM »

Persophone is my ugly bit on the side.
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Re: OJ's guide to having a ugly/fat girl on the side!!!
« Reply #6 on: January 04, 2009, 04:21:27 PM »

Persophone is my ugly bit on the side.

You have fantastical powers of imagination, don't you?
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And I'll dance with you in Vienna, I'll be wearing a river's disguise. The hyacinth wild on my shoulder, my mouth on the dew of your thighs. And I'll bury my soul in a scrapbook, with the photographs there, and the moths and I'll yield to the flood of your beauty my cheap violin and my cross.
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